I have to admit to being an inveterate band name maker-upper, the one I'm most proud of is 'Nervous Germans' which I imagine were an 80s synth pop band. My talents also extend to pub names. I'm determined that I shall purchase and retire to a cosy village pub I shall name 'The Pig Tickler's Arms' where customers can indulge in this life affirming pastime whilst quaffing a pint of locally brewed ale. :)
Let me tell you about one of the best drinking games ever invented- The Pub Name Game. Best in groups, drunk or otherwise inebriated. Get sheets of paper and hand out. Write a good Pub Name at the top of the paper. Draw a representation of that Pub. Fold down over the name and pass to the next person. When you get the person next to you's bit of paper with the drawing on, write down what you THINK it is, then draw your representation. Cover the name, leave the drawing visible. Pass it on. Keep going until you're at the bottom of the paper (or whatever works for you!) And then you get to reveal.the surreal nonsense - we've laughed until it hurts sometimes, as the drawings and Pub names get more and more abstract, and the drawings more and more bizarre. You don't need to be good at drawing- in fact it helps to be a bit...loose as it leaves it open for interpretation. Honestly playing it with a group one time and you'll have a blast. And get to make up loads of ridiculous pub names!
I was in the car once talking about music with my husband and I randomly exclaimed 'I love fleecy pants! It was very cold in North Dakota and my new fleecy pants were just so cozy) My husband (who is an audiophile) responded in a perplexed voice; I've never heard of them. And so Fleecy Pants and the Expandable Waist Band came to be.😁
Ah, Brian Auger and Julie Driscoll….just wandered away from your piece for an hour and absorbed these amazing sounds that are the definition of the 60s. My partner and I have been doing that band name album thing for a few years now. Always makes us smile. We were even making up imaginary tour t-shirts with fictional place names at one point. Thanks for the smiles Tom.
"98% of the population of the planet is employed as a life coach." I think one might have to have been part of the 98%, if only for a brief time, to appreciate how truly brilliant this whole bit is. Thank you, thank you, thank you for making me spit out my morning tea.
I am so glad I stumbled on your Substack! What a joy to read something hilariously entertaining that has nothing to do with politics here in the US. Made my Sunday. I will definitely check out your books. 😃
Amazon take slightly more of a cut than Blackwells but I really don't mind, if it works out more easily for people to get them from there! I generally point people towards independent bookshops but I know that's sometimes not so easy (depending on geography).
Aww, thanks for the morning giggles. This entire piece made me lol, but the bit about band names and album titles really hit home. My husband and I have been coming up with such titles during our entire marriage (52 yrs so far), and we just started writing them down In the last year.
Here in Switzerland, the life coaches already have life coaches. Despite this claim, we are definitely *not* living the future over here. I guess when one has everything one needs already, it's either time for a Birkin Bag or another life coach.
Thank you for making me laugh on a moody Monday, Tom.
I have to admit to being an inveterate band name maker-upper, the one I'm most proud of is 'Nervous Germans' which I imagine were an 80s synth pop band. My talents also extend to pub names. I'm determined that I shall purchase and retire to a cosy village pub I shall name 'The Pig Tickler's Arms' where customers can indulge in this life affirming pastime whilst quaffing a pint of locally brewed ale. :)
Let me tell you about one of the best drinking games ever invented- The Pub Name Game. Best in groups, drunk or otherwise inebriated. Get sheets of paper and hand out. Write a good Pub Name at the top of the paper. Draw a representation of that Pub. Fold down over the name and pass to the next person. When you get the person next to you's bit of paper with the drawing on, write down what you THINK it is, then draw your representation. Cover the name, leave the drawing visible. Pass it on. Keep going until you're at the bottom of the paper (or whatever works for you!) And then you get to reveal.the surreal nonsense - we've laughed until it hurts sometimes, as the drawings and Pub names get more and more abstract, and the drawings more and more bizarre. You don't need to be good at drawing- in fact it helps to be a bit...loose as it leaves it open for interpretation. Honestly playing it with a group one time and you'll have a blast. And get to make up loads of ridiculous pub names!
That sounds brilliant! I must try it some time.
If you do please post the pics for our entertainment. Another good one is trying to draw cartoon characters from memory.
This kind of post is why I’m here. 🌸
I was in the car once talking about music with my husband and I randomly exclaimed 'I love fleecy pants! It was very cold in North Dakota and my new fleecy pants were just so cozy) My husband (who is an audiophile) responded in a perplexed voice; I've never heard of them. And so Fleecy Pants and the Expandable Waist Band came to be.😁
Ah, Brian Auger and Julie Driscoll….just wandered away from your piece for an hour and absorbed these amazing sounds that are the definition of the 60s. My partner and I have been doing that band name album thing for a few years now. Always makes us smile. We were even making up imaginary tour t-shirts with fictional place names at one point. Thanks for the smiles Tom.
Glad you enjoyed them! Julie’s ‘1969’ LP is also excellent (in a different way).
"98% of the population of the planet is employed as a life coach." I think one might have to have been part of the 98%, if only for a brief time, to appreciate how truly brilliant this whole bit is. Thank you, thank you, thank you for making me spit out my morning tea.
Thanks Elise!
I mean, honestly I'd listen to The Life Coaches debut alt folk album, True Potential.
I wonder if your duvet cover method is similar to mine. I have a whole METHOD and it’s great. Also a method for folding fitted sheets.
You can fold a fitted sheet? Begone you devil in human form!
It's a lie. NO ONE can fold a fitted sheet. Not even a devil...
HaaaHaHa! You’re right, you know. I HATE them! I turned to a stretchy fitted sheet and no top sheet. Duvet me. Life-changing!
I have tried to teach my husband to fold fitted sheets to no avail, it is sooo easy and so much neater than the crumbled mess my husband would leave.
Husbands are unteachable ..
I am so glad I stumbled on your Substack! What a joy to read something hilariously entertaining that has nothing to do with politics here in the US. Made my Sunday. I will definitely check out your books. 😃
Thank you, Sally. Nice to hear you enjoyed it. They can be quite expensive to get to the US but Blackwells will do free delivery: https://blackwells.co.uk/bookshop/product/21St-Century-Yokel-by-Tom-Cox/9781783527397
It looks like Amazon sells all your books. Do you get a decent piece of the price, or do you have to give a ton to Jeff Bezos?
Amazon take slightly more of a cut than Blackwells but I really don't mind, if it works out more easily for people to get them from there! I generally point people towards independent bookshops but I know that's sometimes not so easy (depending on geography).
I found 2 independent bookshops in nearby Portsmouth (NH) that either have or can get your books. Win-win. 😃
Thank you for the delightful dose of whimsy😊
Honest, to-the-point, with LOTs of humor. I love your writing Tom!
Thanks! Very nice of you to say so.
Just ordered villager and notebook finally, increasingly enamored with your writing as shared here!
Oh, fabulous. Thanks for letting me know, Bruce. Hope you enjoy them!
Aww, thanks for the morning giggles. This entire piece made me lol, but the bit about band names and album titles really hit home. My husband and I have been coming up with such titles during our entire marriage (52 yrs so far), and we just started writing them down In the last year.
Here in Switzerland, the life coaches already have life coaches. Despite this claim, we are definitely *not* living the future over here. I guess when one has everything one needs already, it's either time for a Birkin Bag or another life coach.
Thank you for making me laugh on a moody Monday, Tom.
Oh my goodness Tom - that's 2 newsletters in a row where I've been laughing so much that I've snorted my tea!
Thank you for cheering me up.
I am a dab hand at the inside out duvet cover technique, but you've sent me down an online rabbit hole to check out all the other techniques.....
A friend and I used to dream of starting a band where the band name would change with every album, but the album name would always be the same.
That's brilliant!😅
Kind if like Hall & Oats after the break-up then back-together, but this time the love is gone